Beater hunt, 2017 edition

"Decay buys too many beaters" (decay) 08/18/2016 at 11:30 • Filed to: None

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Hey guys, so I’ve had the 540i for about a year now and it’s been great. One of the most well rounded cars I’ve ever driven and I’ll be real sad to see it go (full 1 year ownership review coming in a few weeks), but I live in a state where changing out cars is extremely cheap (no tax, $70 to transfer title, $45 to register) and variety is the spice of life. For the last several years I’ve been buying a new beater at the end of every summer and driving that wheneverthe weather or environment does not suit the FR-S or the bikes.

My requirements are as follows, none of them are really set in stone and I’m willing to bend most of them for the right vehicle.

Budget : $2000 + market value on a E39 540i manual. Preferably less than that

Style : Four doors, I already have two two door sport cars, so a larger car is a plus. I’ve also recently bought a house so I should probably consider trucks as well. Luxury is also somewhat important, the BMW has spoiled me a bit here.

Chassis : Handling is important, no boats. Bare minimum is a robust cheap aftermarket to sort out shortcomings

Engine : I like V8s, inline 6s, and turbo 4s. No V6s. Should have enough power for shenanigans.

Drive: Rear wheel drive. No FWD unless it’s cool, no AWD unless really cool.

Fuel economy : Ain’t give shit

Transmission : Manual, unless the car is interesting in other ways and never came with a manual option. If one was available, I will not accept an auto.

Country of origin : Europe or Japan, domestics don’t do anything for me, but perhaps someone here has a suggestion that can change my mind. No Audi.

Reliability : It needs not be perfect, I have other vehicles I can use. I’m also a pretty decent wrench, but parts should be readily available.

Vehicles I’m considering that meet these requirements are as follows.

X308 XJR. (Current frontrunner)

E36 M3

Gs300 Manual

Ls400 (they’re so cheap!)

P71 (they’re so cheap!)

WRX (not really my style, but I’ve never owned one so I’d like to see what all the hype is about)

Fast Saabs (I really liked my 900, I’d like to try an aero or a viggen)

S class or E430 (why the hell not?)

Daily the world’s worth Miata for lols

So what else do you guys recommend I take a look at?

djmt1 > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 11:37

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I definitely back the Jag especially the one pictured since it just looks so right and it will be reliable since it’s a Ford Mondeo underneath because of course everything from that era was.

Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies > djmt1 08/18/2016 at 11:40

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That was the X-Type, not the XJ.

AddictedToM3s - Drives a GC > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 11:40

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I’d pick the M3 or the WRX. Although as a beater the WRX is probably better suited for that purpose. They’re pretty fun cars but don’t expect luxury from them.

Decay buys too many beaters > djmt1 08/18/2016 at 11:48

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I believe the full sized jags are a bespoke chassis

djmt1 > Jordan and the Slowrunner, Boomer Intensifies 08/18/2016 at 11:49

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If the X Type was a Mondeo than so was the XJ and the S Type and heck let’s throw in the DB7 actually no that was an XJS but let’s dump in some Volvos too since Ford had them under their wing at the time and of course we can’t forget Mazda and the MX5. They’re all Mondeos in reality.

someassemblyrequired > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 11:51

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Owned X-type, glad X-type is gone, would think similar story with S-type. Buy an XJ or XK if you want a Jag, make sure tensioner update is done on the early V8s (though I think timing chain on the R is upgraded, but you should verify).

djmt1 > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 11:54

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Maybe or maybe they’re Mondeos. All hail the Mondeo, life giver to every Ford product between 96 & 07.

Justin Hughes > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 11:59

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After the Bimmer you’d be disappointed in the P71's relative cheapness. OTOH, it sounds AWESOME with a pair of Flowmasters, and you’ll get a ton of road respect. (Meaning, everyone will think you’re a cop and get the hell out of your way.) Some P71s, like mine, came with a posi. That, plus snow tires, and it was one of the best winter cars I ever had.

Or you could go with the WRX, because AWD. Again, don’t expect luxury, but that’ll be the best of these choices in the snow.

jjhats > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 12:09

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Lexus is300 manual. looks great is rwd and manual and can be had for 5k or less if your lucky.

Decay buys too many beaters > jjhats 08/18/2016 at 12:46

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Plus 2JZ :)

Decay buys too many beaters > Justin Hughes 08/18/2016 at 12:48

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I’m actually not a fan of AWD generally. They feel like a FWD car to me when pushed and I don’t get snow.

On the P71 front, I can live with less luxury, considering the cost savings over other stuff on the list.

Decay buys too many beaters > someassemblyrequired 08/18/2016 at 12:48

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Also no V8s from Cali right? Those Nikasil linings will be shot.

jjhats > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 12:58

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the slowest 2jz in the world....still sounds fantastic. you should do it!

Decay buys too many beaters > jjhats 08/18/2016 at 13:06

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You know what? This will decimate all, after, I put about fifteen hundred in it or less. If we have to, overnight parts from China.

jjhats > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 13:13

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you forgot the part where I laugh at you when you bring in a crummy Toyota then act shocked to see the same exact engine in the bay that it came with from the factory

Decay buys too many beaters > jjhats 08/18/2016 at 13:26

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Hey Brian was a bit of a tool, they probably just thought he had brought them an automatic NA Supra!

Bytemite > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 13:32

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Found the perfect car that fits all your requirements.

5-6 grand, 4 door luxury, perfectly balanced, small and light, double wishbone chassis, 2JZ smooth I6, RWD, manual, meh fuel economy, Japanese, Lexus reliability...

Decay buys too many beaters > Bytemite 08/18/2016 at 13:36

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Oh man! forgot about the IS, added to the list.

someassemblyrequired > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 14:29

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You want an inline six anyways. XJR was supercharged 4.0 litre 6 in 94-97 X300's. Or go mental and pick up an X300 XJ12 (94-96).

Decay buys too many beaters > someassemblyrequired 08/18/2016 at 14:38

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I would 100% love an XJ6R, but they are pretty hard to come by. Think I’ve only ever seen one or two on the local CL.

As for the V12.

That engine bay triggers me...

I would need to grow at least 2 baby sized hands on professional basketball player regulation length arms to consider myself worthy to work on one.

someassemblyrequired > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 14:44

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LOL totally. Also you need a second set of regular size arms to replace all the front suspension components, which are inevitably thrashed by the weight of the engine.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 16:41

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I know where you can find a cheap E430 

Decay buys too many beaters > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 08/18/2016 at 18:24

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Deets?

Also what’s “cheap” I basically stole the E39 and I’d love to keep that trend going :)

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 18:44

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It was my daily before I bought my 55. 18xxxx miles. Staggered 17" wheels with 5-6/32" tires, but I could probably find some more used tires if you want. 2000 model year.

The good: New front lower ball joints and bushings. Alignment is spot on. I’ll do a service in a week or two. Runs and drives pretty damn good, even though the shocks and springs are original. Sport package. Silver with black leather (not mb tex). Has pneumatic seat adjustments, lumbar/bolsters. Pretty much every option for the time. Interior is probably 8/10.

The bad: CEL is on for catalyst efficiency, but someone welded aftermarket cats in at some point, needs tags so it will have to go through deq. I was planning on either welding in new cats of higher quality and doing a better job than the last guy or just plugging in emulators for the downstream. SRS light is on for font passenger weight sensor. I was considering doing that before selling it too. Right side and trunk have some dents and very minor surface rust where a little bit of paint is missing. Sway bar links are a little noisy. Valve covers leak a little bit.

Perfect example of a nice beater. Key word: beater. I was planning on fixing all of the mechanical/warning light stuff before selling it, but I’m getting lazy and I’m over it.

I’ll let it go for $2k as is, which is about a grand less than I’ve seen them go on CL, but I haven’t looked in a while. You can tell me I’m batshit if you want, that’s fine. If you don’t want it I’ll probably just let my sister in law keep driving it until I get around to fixing crap.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 08/18/2016 at 18:44

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OH AND THE CUP HOLDER ISN’T EVEN BROKEN!

Decay buys too many beaters > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 08/18/2016 at 20:10

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No bad!

What kind of time frame you looking at? I’m probably about a month out from buying something new. Have to finish up project “world’s worst Miata” and get the garage space to fix the remaining minor issues on the E39 for sale.

Decay buys too many beaters > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 08/18/2016 at 20:13

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Dear god, what the hell is it with Germans of that era designing absolute shit over complicated cupholders?

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 20:25

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No rush at all. Just let me know if you want to check it out at some point. We can even work a deal for parts/work if you want to take care of the issues if you’re really interested.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 20:26

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Right!? Mine does this goofy swivel/spiral upwards then open thing. Janky.

Decay buys too many beaters > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 08/18/2016 at 20:41

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Yeah I looked up a picture, might have actually face-palmed.

Decay buys too many beaters > AMGtech - now with more recalls! 08/18/2016 at 20:48

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Will do!

How awful are the welds on those cats? :) The ones on my miata look like it was a blind dude’s first time welding.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Decay buys too many beaters 08/18/2016 at 20:52

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The welds are about as good as can be expected considering how awfully the pipes are fitted together.